randomly

s. asks me how can i handle the uncertainty, the possibility of betrayal. she asks me how can i trust - and, if you ask me, i think she asks the hard questions only. i can handle the uncertainty as i can handle the life - the most unlikely, uncertain thing on the face of the earth. i'm serious here. there is nothing with a motion as random as life. we never know what is going to happen next. two months ago i would not, definetely not, imagine january as weird and insane as it has been. and it has been weird. and insane.

the possibility of betrayal? please. we are betrayed all the time, half of them by ourselves. the concept of betrayal implies a "serious" relationship, something that not even i believe. there are several kinds of relationship, and all of them imply a feeling of ownership, of possession. it's our nature. i can't say i don't care, but believe me, i try not to. it's pointless. back to the uncertainty of life: i have no clue about what in a thousand hells is going to happen tomorrow. hell, not even this evening.

how can i trust? i trust the world, and i trust no human being but myself. life is not a social walk over the world; it's more like to be standing alone in a cage.