disillusionment.

dreaming is still free of taxes. which is good. but dreaming, too, has a price, a price that can be way to expensive for some to pay. i'm not talking about money. i'm not talking about anything material, anything that, whether we have it or not, turns to dust as we turn to dust. i'm talking about disillusionment. i'm talking about the feeling that settles upon us when we understand that what between us and our dream lies reality, with its unbreakable walls. somethings can be changed. some sacrifices can be made. but not everything can be changed, nor all sacrifices can be made. we cannot change our past. our background. a handful of small, seemingly meaningless things that are truly what we are made of. we can deny those things as much as we like, but that's a hollow exercise. reality always wins. it does not play by any external rules: it makes the rules, enforces them, and plays the referee. jury, judge and executioner. life is nothing but its very own game, the game of reality, whose rules cannot be broken, and can only be bent to a degree. a short one, mind you. everything else is petty in comparison. and everything we blame for our disillusionment is truly innocent - and even if it isn't, having a go at them it's often pointless, a waste of ammunition. that's just the word: waste. we waste ourselves in petty struggles because we deny the obvious: either we adapt or lose.