What you want is the best of both worlds. Is to eat the cake and have the cake too. You do know, though, that such is impossible outside the realm of magical thinking. We always have to make choices, and sooner or later, those choices force us to compromise - or else. We can deceive ourselves into thinking that such compromise will never arrive, that it will be possible after all (and despite everything), that we will be able to pull it through, that we'll find someone that thinks just as we do. It is sheer deception - or, if you prefer a little sugar-coating, it is magical thinking - as we are deceiving ourselves into thinking that we think like that, when we don't. In some things, we're just like everyone else, we fall prey to the so-called "human nature" just the same. We might pretend we don't, we might believe with all our heart that we are different - deep down, we're the same, we think the same, we feel the same. From this point forward, all illusions are pretty irrelevant.