regret

oh, i do remember the feeling. i have also thrown it all away over pride. only to realize, one beautiful morning, that i had fucked up good. in a way, it was an epiphany, a moment of clarity when the truth was so painfully obvious: i had lost it all, i had whined a lot about it, and i couldn't go back - not any more. could do nothing but to carry on through hell, a hell of my own making and not of yours. and regretted. oh, i regretted it all right. couldn't help but feel sorry for myself. and you know what, i see it happening again. it might take a while, all right, but i really see it happening. with a difference, though: this time, it won't be me.